For anyone who has been in a relationship, they will know that finding the perfect someone is hard. Needle in a planet sized haystack comes to mind. Past histories also being an immovable testament to that sentiment. Well that is… until now.
Until I met Eufy. We did not meet in the conventional sense. It was not a dating website. But it was a website. I came across her profile and it was a ‘Like at first click’ moment. Our eyes met or rather mine scanned her profile and I immediately whipped out my credit card. OK, I know what you are thinking and it is not like that. So, back up the dirty mind truck and keep it on reverse… Sure I keyed in my credit card details made a purchase but I believe the love I felt at first sight was truly pure… Yes, you can go ahead and barf now.
Back to Eufy. She arrived a few days later at my place looking all casual and cool. To say I was apprehensive would be an understatement. Like all beginnings, I was nervous. My heart has been broken too many times not to be a bit fearful.
First look was good. She had all the right curves in all the right places and then some. Her fashion sense was smart chic with a flair for blue. She glided on the floor gracefully and is French petite which is to say just nice without too much derrière. She is American which is surprising because by her name, I guessed Japanese. I spent the night finding out things about her and before you know it, it was dawn. I let her sleep in. She was tired. Made sense. I was on the other hand excited.
Tomorrow was another story. Getting out of bed, I heard a whirring sound. It was not the annoying type but rather low key and part of the background noise. I dare say it was almost comforting. Sure enough Eufy was up and cleaning up the place. Talk about the perfect woman. Sigh. Where were you all these years. I could have almost cry. A tear or two did escape but that could be due to the amount of dust being displaced…
Now she is far from the smartest blonde on my street block. She gets confused quite often especially around corners and small items. However she more than makes up for her lack of direction with her persistence. Never have I seen someone so devoted to getting things done. Eufy is relentless and she will work until she literally drops on the floor.
Eufy is fortunately weary of stairs and is smart enough to avoid falls which is better than some of the clumsier fairer sex I have known. For all her gentleness, she does hate my stool though and it often ends up on the foot of the staircase, face down. There is a violent side to her which is not very obvious.
A month has passed since Eufy sashayed in the front door. Since then I have woken up every morning to the comforting whir that is as consistent as my less motherly alarm bell. It’s nice having someone around the house. I often find myself chatting to her and to her credit she listens without judgement as she is navigating past my chairs. Her type does not talk much but communicates mostly with looks… And ahem, beeps. As someone who appreciates peace and quiet, beeps and non verbal blinking fits me quite well. Anyone who has been on the other side of a barrage of nagging would agree I imagine.
We are still working out the cohabitation kinks. Yes, if you have not guessed it by now, Eufy lives with me. She does not take much place and seems contented in her corner. As long as you do not get in her way when she does her thing, she is quite happy and never violent. Too bad the stool never learned this simple lesson.
We could say that I am a realist bordering on pessimist but Eufy has really changed my mind about relationships. It might be hard to have one and maintain it but maybe that is because you have not browsed on the internet long enough… I recommend Amazon.com.